Ben, Kate, Archie, Annie: May 2013

Gettin' in the car to take a nice drive.

Here we go, what a nice day, don't you think?

Whoa, Annie watch out for that turn...!

And Archie is gone.

We've been having a fun week. This particular day Annie learned how to drive and Archie learned how to play tic tac toe. I know, I know, they both seem a little young to be doing such BIG things, but if you never let them try, you'll never know what they are capable of... okay, okay, but Archie really did learn to play tic tac toe on the big outdoor set at the park.

Today was Mothers Day. I absolutely love my husband for making this day special. Actually it was the whole weekend. He made breakfast, he took care of the kids needs, bought me my favorite treats, and sat through Hello Dolly with me, only sleeping minimally. He helped the kids make cards, he told me he loved me, and showed me that I am more than just 'mom' and 'wife', which are my two favorite things to be, but that I am also Kate, who loves to run, loves to dream of taking a wild kayaking trip, loves to plan adventures, read books, start projects. Today was Mothers Day, and I got a lot of special attention.

But I am struggling with how to articulate my feelings. Gratitude is what I feel. I feel like on Mothers Day I should tell my family how grateful I am to be Mom, to be Wife. I want to make them cards telling them how special they are and that I feel blessed to be in this family. The truth is that Ben makes me feel special every day-- in our life together Ben has given me honesty, sincerity, love, friendship. I feel special because we are partners, he cares about what troubles me, and I care about what troubles him. He likes to make me laugh and I can tell when he wants to be teased. I hear him pray for me and I get to pray for him. He doesn't like doing all of the things I like to do, and sometimes his interests are no where on my radar. I used to joke with him in the beginning of our marriage when I discovered where our interests diverged in certain instances that being different was hard. Meaning, I wanted us always to be the same, have the same interests, be together in every activity, holding hands being best buddies and never be without one another. Of course I knew that wouldn't be the case and it is better that we have differences, in opinion, likes, dislikes, recreative activity etc. And of course what this means is that we learn from each other in unexpected and sometimes really wonderful ways!

I have a husband who lives my faith with me. We have a home where we try every day to make Christ the center. I have two treasures who are learning to be polite, not scream in the house, that art projects, when wet with paint stay on the craft table, that being kind is not just nice but vital. They are my treasures; there is no other word I can think to describe them. At the end of the day they want hugs and kisses, they want to play cars on the rug, draw together, bake together, play 'babies', play grocery store, go to the park, take a run-- right now they want to do all of these things with me and with Ben. I know the day will come when being with friends will be more fun than being with mom and dad, it makes my heart a little sad. My treasures will still be mine, but they will be growing and wanting different things. I never knew what kind of parent I would be. Strict, too permissive, hovering, wishy-washy; I still don't know. We have home rules and we do our best to be consistant and compassionate. But what I do know is that being with my kids every day is making me a better person. I think that is part of the reason I am so in love with them. They are so forgiving, so loving, so faithful. I am learning how to be a better mother and better spouse because my family love me and count on me and hold me accountable.

What a great privilege to be given the opportunity to grow in this family atmosphere. This Mothers Day I want to say that I am grateful to my Heavenly Father for helping me become a wife and a mother, helping me become a better version of Kate, a better daughter, sister, friend. I love my kids. I love my husband. Tonight Archie had a small break down because he threw a ball at Ben's head (a little funny, but not nice and it was the 2nd time and he was warned that there would be consequences, I made sure not to laugh in a way that Archie could hear me as he threw the ball at Ben...) He had to relinquish his dessert and sit in time out. Unfortunately, while in time out, Annie got a little too close and was kicked by the sad little boy. Uh oh, now it was time to go inside, and sit on his bed away from everyone else. It was sad. I think it was sad for all of us. No one yelled, and Archie didn't protest. He knew he had done wrong and needed to now, obey and accept the consequences. Ben and I knew we needed to let him experience the consequences, but he was already weeping as he went inside. Annie came running to me, informing me that "Arch sad, Arch sad." Ben and I stayed outside for a few moments and allowed our son to be able to feel his consequence. No one yelled, there was just crying from our son, concern from our daughter and silence as we sat. I went in a few minutes later, held Archie in my arms and he cried a little bit more. The strange thing about all of this was that no one was mad at Archie, we never stopped loving him, and in fact wanted to stop his suffering immediately. But we knew that we shouldn't. We had to let him feel some of that temporary pain of time out. But as his parents we also felt that pain. In order to teach him, we felt this was all necessary.

I held Archie for a few more minutes, Annie and Daddy came in and we said family prayers. Then we got ready for bed, read a couple of books, sang I am a child of God and a few kisses and hugs and I-love-yous later all was right in the Brady world again.

Something about this experience tonight and many others like it makes me deeply love my heavenly father, Jesus Christ, my children and my husband. We are bound together by seeking comfort from one another, and by being held accountable for our actions towards each other. We grow in love by seeking to feel for our loved ones the love that our Father in Heaven and Jesus Christ feel for us.

Today was great. Happy Mothers day to all the moms and moms-to-be out there.